I was contacted by a lovely lady who recently gave birth to a healthy baby girl! I love this letter she has written to her doctor.
Dear Dr. Erickson,
I thankfully gave birth last week to a healthy baby after an all natural and uneventful pregnancy. I am writing you this letter because exactly a year ago, after my second miscarriage, you told me I could not sustain a pregnancy without IVF. You said my chances of sustaining a natural pregnancy are next to none. These were very harsh words from you but they did not prevent me from looking for other doctors. The only reason you gave me for my chemical pregnancies was I had low-quality eggs. You also said I should consider donor eggs because of poor ovarian reserve.
I went to Chicago and had a consultation with Dr Joanne Kwak-Kim, Reproductive Immunologist. She had me do blood work and discovered that my thyroid function was not optimal, I had a positive ANA and my NK Cells count was elevated. She put me on low-dose aspirin. I started seeing an endocrinologist who put me on Levoxyl to improve my thyroid hormone levels.
After two months on the Levoxyl, I became pregnant. Dr Kwak-Kim put me on progesterone supplement, calcium and Vitamin D. Here I am now, nine months later, gratefully holding a healthy baby conceived naturally.
I hope this letter will encourage you to at least order further testing for your patients before having them pay for IVF. I know that is how you make money but your patients deserve a choice and testing to diagnose the real cause of their infertility. IVF is not the only solution and REs should at least explore all the possibilities before throwing it on the table.
I am actively advocating further testing before IVF with all the infertile women I encounter online. I also wanted to make sure I inform you about my situation. I am making this an open letter and sending it to other REs as well.
I have a guest blog I’ve been meaning to post, so I promise to share it soon. She’s another Dr. Kwak-Kim success story, as well as an advocate. You won’t want to miss the letter she wrote to her previous RE, who diminished her hopes of achieving a successful pregnancy. He was wrong!! If you would like to share a post, please email me @ Baby4Lisa(at)gmail(dot)com. It can be anything uplifting or inspiring about infertility, adoption, surrogacy, pregnancy, childbirth, or motherhood.
Graham will be 4 months old in about a week! He is such a happy, alert, curious, playful little guy. We’ve seen a big change over the past few weeks. I can tell his tummy problems don’t bother him as much. It makes me feel so good to see him so happy! Graham is a great sleeper, too. Every morning, I wake up before him and can’t wait for him to wake up! He rarely cries anymore for me to come and get him. I tend to find him munching on his fingers, looking around, and cooing. He gives me millions of smiles in the morning and throughout the day and makes my heart overflow. We are incredibly lucky and blessed to have him in our lives.
He had a weight check last Monday and is now about 12 lbs and 23 inches!! Graham is such a little man, but growing amazingly well. I think about how teeny tiny and skinny he was when he was born. He’s getting heavy now lol! There are some cute little fat rolls forming! He’s in a phase where he won’t let us hold him like a baby anymore! I miss cuddles! I love that he’s growing, meeting milestones, and becoming more independent – but at the same time, it’s sad. Sometimes he looks like a little boy, not a baby! It’s like whoa, where did my little baby go?!
I mentioned in my last post that I started my first PPAF. Andy and I discussed TTC, and we are not ready to make any decisions regarding the possibility of future fertility treatments. I don’t know if we’ll ever go down that road again. We just want to enjoy our sweet boy. One thing we did decide upon, is not preventing pregnancy. We are going with the flow and letting nature take its course. If another miracle should come our way, we would feel amazingly blessed. I can’t even fathom that happening. It would blow my mind! It seems very unlikely, especially since I have so few eggs left.
Andy seems to want to try naturally. He was pretty insistent on lots of BD this cycle lol. I want to keep it as relaxed as possible. I mean, we’re on the same page though. We are enjoying each other and soaking up these precious moments with Graham. I will probably be testing monthly, unless AF shows first. If I somehow tested positive, I would need to start Lovenox and Prednisone. Right now, I’m taking Metformin, baby aspirin, and prenatals with extra Folate. Those meds are good for my diagnoses and overall health.
I don’t even know where the past month has gone!!
Every week, it seems Graham is doing something new!
Week 9: He began “talking” a lot more. Watches my mouth when I speak. Enjoys when I mimic his sounds or introduce new sounds or words. I loooove his coos, as well as the interaction between us!! Has smiled A LOT everyday since week 7! He’s a ham! Graham “the ham”! SMILES ARE THE BEST THING EVER!! He loves music and Barney (the purple dinosaur TV show).
Week 10: Started rolling over onto his side and tummy! He has some trouble getting in the position he actually wants and rolling back over onto his back. Prefers to lie on side. He no longer likes the Rock ‘n Play Sleeper, since he cannot move around much in there. Sleeps in crib at night and Pack ‘n Play during the day. He’s obsessed with his fingers and thumbs!
Week 11: Loves baths suddenly! He used to scream the whole way through. “Talks” to our kitties and stares at them with delight. Won’t take a pacifier because chewing on his fingers is more enjoyable. I keep thinking he might be getting ready to start teething, but I’m not sure. Probably too early for that.
Week 12: Finally fitting into 0-3 month clothes (at least most of them)! “Talking” even more, with new sounds! Talks to himself while lying in his crib or Pack ‘n Play – too stinkin’ cute! Sleeps about 8 hours at night in his crib! He likes when I put him in a sitting or standing position. His little legs are strong! He can push off when I hold him in a standing position. Holds himself up on his forearms/elbows during tummy time. His favorite thing is for me to walk him around the house and tell him what various objects are, so he can study everything. He’s fascinated by ceiling fans! LOL! He’s a drool machine!
Week 13: Sooo close to laughing! He kinda does laugh. It’s a chuckle/cough/haha sound!
Graham still has reflux (I guess they grow out of it eventually, but his has been a bad case). We started him on Zantac after his 2 month appt. Sometimes I think it’s helping quite a bit, and other times not at all. We use all the other tips and tricks to try to help, too. His next check up isn’t until month 4, but if he seems to be struggling too much, I’ll get him in sooner. I know he’s still gaining good weight, despite spitting up and other symptoms! He eats 4-6 oz every 4 hours.
I can’t believe how much he grows and changes everyday! I think I’ll be in disbelief about that forever! Plus, it’s still hard to believe he’s mine sometimes!! He and I are becoming more “in sync”. It’s easier to understand his needs, which makes things less stressful and more enjoyable. Even so, there are times when I have no idea what’s bothering him. I usually chalk it up to his tummy problems or just general fussiness. You can’t keep your baby happy 24-7 no matter what you do, unfortunately. I used to feel so horrible about that, but I feel more at peace now (usually).
I love being a Mom!!! I’m beginning to feel more like a Mom. At first, I was just a hot mess LOL. Now things are so much better. Andy is so great with Graham. It makes my heart so happy when I see them together. Graham loves his Daddy. We enjoy family time and walks together. Andy and I try to spend quality time together, just the two of us, when we can. I’m really needing a “take care of me day” soon. It’s healthy to take a break. My whole world is Graham though. <3 I sing Barney songs and talk about poop a lot LOL! I forget how to talk about normal adult things haha.
Other than that, I started my first post-partum AF on November 1st. Oh, how I did not miss periods LOL!
Graham is a busy little guy these days! He’s awake a lot more and loves to play! He had his 2 month check up last week and is doing great!! He now weighs 9 lbs, 4.9 oz and is 21 inches long! That’s a growth increase of 2 lbs and 2 inches since his 1 month check up! The pediatrician said it was perfect! It’s pretty amazing he’s close to doubling his birth weight!!
He now eats 5 oz every 3-4 hours. Although, sometimes he only takes 3.5 – 4 oz. What a good eater! We started Zantac for his reflux last week. I’m not sure if I’ve noticed a difference yet. For some reason, he’s been very fussy for the past week. Maybe a growth spurt. It’s hard to tell. We’ve continued doing tons of stuff to help his tummy problems.
Andy and I are doing well! I’m pretty worn out, since I’m the primary caregiver. I mean, Andy would help more if he could. We have a good routine going, but babies have their own schedules haha. I follow Graham’s cues while trying to keep things somewhat structured. I’ve always had a hard time going with the flow, since I’m such an OCD nutty planner. I’m learning though!! Seems like anytime I get frazzled, Graham gives me a sweet smile, and I feel a lot better! His smile is the best thing in the world!
Graham will be 9 weeks old this Saturday, which is also my birthday! We don’t have plans, I just want to relax. Andy will be off work, so that’ll be perfect. The best birthday gift is having Graham.
Now for some spam from week 8!